Some Assembly Required
Photo by Ashim D’Silva on Unsplash
This weekend, I fought the bookshelf and the bookshelf (almost) won.
This has been a weekend of assembly and disassembly, but finally, I prevailed. The focus of my efforts was a 72” bookshelf that arrived at our home in two boxes almost two months after we ordered it.
I’m not the fix-it-guy or the put-it-together guy. My brother, on the other hand, can take apart and assemble almost anything. My son has the same aptitude. I missed this very practical gene. Instead, I tend to sit among the pieces, crumple the directions, and scream.
Did I mention pieces? There must have been more than 700 that fell from these two boxes when I opened them. And the instructions, while in English, appeared to have been written in some kind of short-hand verbal and visual code. Or maybe they were written fill-in-the-blank style because there sure seemed to be a lot of blanks.
This time, I wanted to overcome my lack of assembly aptitude. I carefully unpacked the boxes and placed all the pieces in an organized fashion along with the instructions in our family room, which would be home to our new shelf. And it sat like that, unpacked and in pieces for two weeks.
Every time I’d walk by the disassembled shelf, I’d glower at it and mutter, “Just wait. Your time’s coming.”
To which I could imagine its reply, “I’m ready and waiting for you, sucker.”
Finally, I jumped in. According to the vague instructions, the only tool needed was a Phillips-head screwdriver. I would have done better with a mallet, hatchet, gallon of glue, and four rolls of duct tape.
i must have put together and taken apart at least three major sections and at one point, I told my wife, “These shelves are just going to have to go on backward.”
But finally, I won. The shelf came together as advertised, with maybe a small gap here or there. It’s up and filled with books. In fact, we’re thinking of getting another one just like.
After all, the second one should be a breeze. But just in case, I’ll keep the glue and the hatchet handy.
